I recently saw a headline that said the Porsche Cayenne Turbo Electric has become the fastest SUV Car and Driver has ever tested. It apparently reaches 60 miles per hour faster than the Corvette ZR1 despite being three tons.
The review of the 5,960-pound SUV noted its insane torque, 1,139 horsepower, and wild acceleration. It hits 60 mph in 2.1 seconds. I mean, there is no denying that’s incredible, although I would argue that EVs killed the 0-60 stats. Like, what EV isn’t quick? The Cayenne Turbo Electric hits 100 mph in 4.5 seconds, 150 mph in 10.1 seconds, and finishes a quarter-mile run in 9.5 seconds, hitting 146 mph.
But I guess all it made me think was, WHY ARE CARS GETTING SO F***ING MASSIVE?!
The reason that vehicles are gaining weight
As Car and Driver pointed out, the Corvette ZR1 is 2,100 pounds less than the Cayenne Turbo Electric. That’s an entire Lotus Elise (plus some). Of course, it’s like comparing apples to oranges: EV to gas, SUV to sports car… But it does shine a light on how heavy vehicles have become in general.
Sure, it’s cool that you can hit 60 mph in two seconds, although I doubt anyone with a family wants to do that while heading to the beach. But, you are driving a bulky, chunky, overweight vehicle.
Forbes called it “carbesity.” The Mazda MX-5 Miata is nowhere near as popular in the United States as the Honda CR-V. People want big, ugly, and obese. In Europe, there are around 150 car models that can’t even fit in public parking spots. Weight has increased by over 20% since 2001.
The main reason? People want it. Plain and simple. And fat. People want SUVs and crossovers, which are chunky by nature. The aforementioned CR-V is nearly 4,000 pounds. The RAV4 is close at 3,775 pounds. On top of that, people want electric and hybrid SUVs. Due to the required components, like batteries and motors, these vehicles weigh even more.
Lightweight cars don’t really appeal to families. SUVs feel safe and capable. It’s not like you’re going to trust a Corvette or Miata with your kid. At least not as much. Light cars are great for the track. They’re fast and handle well. They can be bare bones and loud and that’s fine. But commuters want comfort. They want cushiony seats, tons of screens, a quiet cabin, electric doors and sunroofs… All of this adds weight. And that’s fine.
You may not feel alive or connected while driving a CR-V. But it has a good safety rating and you can bully other cars that won’t let you merge. What more could a family want?





